1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: “I am very rich. Marry me!” – That’s Direct Marketing
2. You’re at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says: “He’s very rich. Marry him.” – That’s Advertising
3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day, you call and say: “Hi, I’m very rich. Marry me.” – That’s Telemarketing
4. You’re at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of the car) for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say:” By the way, I’m rich. Will you marry me?” – That’s Public Relations
5. You’re at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says:
“You are very rich! Can you marry Me!?” – That’s Brand Recognition
6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: “I am very rich. Marry me!” She gives you a nice hard slap on your face. – That’s Customer Feedback
7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: “I am very rich. Marry me!” And she introduces you to her husband. – That’s demand and supply gap
8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tells her: “I’m rich. Will you marry me?” And she goes with him – That’s competition eating into your market share
9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: “I’m rich, Marry me!” your wife arrives. – That’s restriction for entering new markets
10. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You walk up to her and say, “I’m richer than your husband. Divorce him, claim alimony and marry me. Together we will be richer and more prosperous.” – That’s Merger and Acquisition?
By Samuel R. OR Samir Kamble OR both OR probably more authors OR maybe maybe just one which I have no idea about him/her.
Copied and pasted from here.
Friday, September 3, 2010
Sunday, August 29, 2010
1300131300
Operator: McDonald's delivery, how may I help you?
Me: I would like to order for a delivery.
Operator: Can I have your name please sir?
Me: This is Mr. ***.
Operator: Can I confirm your phone number is zero one ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **?
Me: Yeah.
Operator: And the delivery address is ** ** ** ** ** **?
Me: Yeah.
Operator: How may I take your order sir?
Me: I'd like a medium double GCB set.
Operator: Anything else sir?
Me: Yeah, I'd like to change the regular coke to a diet coke and that's all.
Operator: Okay, so you have a coke light.
Me: Yeah (assuming she was trying to tell me I want a coke light)
Operator: Anything else sir?
Me: That's all.
Operator: Okay sir, your total including delivery fee would be twenty one ringgit fifteen cents sir.
Me: Oh yeah, no ice for the drink too.
Operator: Anything else sir?
Me: No, that would be all.
Operator: Okay sir, your total including delivery fee would be twenty one ringgit fifteen cents sir.
Me: Okay.
Operator: Anything else sir?
Me: Err, no.. That's all.
Operator: Okay sir, your total including delivery fee would be twenty one ringgit fifteen cents sir.
Me: Okay.
Operator: Your order number is 106-***** and delivery would be made within 45 mins. Thank you for calling sir, have a nice day sir.
*Hung up.
Me: I would like to order for a delivery.
Operator: Can I have your name please sir?
Me: This is Mr. ***.
Operator: Can I confirm your phone number is zero one ** ** ** ** ** ** ** **?
Me: Yeah.
Operator: And the delivery address is ** ** ** ** ** **?
Me: Yeah.
Operator: How may I take your order sir?
Me: I'd like a medium double GCB set.
Operator: Anything else sir?
Me: Yeah, I'd like to change the regular coke to a diet coke and that's all.
Operator: Okay, so you have a coke light.
Me: Yeah (assuming she was trying to tell me I want a coke light)
Operator: Anything else sir?
Me: That's all.
Operator: Okay sir, your total including delivery fee would be twenty one ringgit fifteen cents sir.
Me: Oh yeah, no ice for the drink too.
Operator: Anything else sir?
Me: No, that would be all.
Operator: Okay sir, your total including delivery fee would be twenty one ringgit fifteen cents sir.
Me: Okay.
Operator: Anything else sir?
Me: Err, no.. That's all.
Operator: Okay sir, your total including delivery fee would be twenty one ringgit fifteen cents sir.
Me: Okay.
Operator: Your order number is 106-***** and delivery would be made within 45 mins. Thank you for calling sir, have a nice day sir.
*Hung up.
Wednesday, March 31, 2010
JeaneRozancetgity@hotmail.com?
Best conversation ever had on IM. Work harder, bot programmers. Please add some Calculus solutions in next time.
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | watch me naked go to http://www.freecamlink.net/cnnp | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Who are you? | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | hey | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Yes | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Hi | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | i'm 21/f your a male right? | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Yes | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Do I know you? | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | nice, I just got off work and finally got some time to relax which site did i msg you from again? | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | You didn't message me from any site | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | You added me here | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | I am a little busy right now, trying to upload some new pics if ya wanna check them out go http://twurl.nl/twrgk6 tell me what ya think :-) | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Which I really have no idea who you are | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | I know a way we can chat and have a better time.. do you cam? | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | I don't | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | Well i don't do yahoo cam or any other cam because i have been recorded before... But i do know one site you can watch me on cam, that assures me no one records... | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Sadly | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | I mean... Do you want to see me on my cam? | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | I don't either | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Sadly | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | Ok go to http://www.freecamlink.net/cn27 and click on "JOIN FOR FREE" orange button at the top of the page to join up for FREE. | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | LOL | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Idiotic bot replying messages? | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | fill out your contact information and then on the next page... | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | fill out your cc info baby for verification ONLY, their card will not be charged. | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | I would be glad if you forget bout the cam stuff, help me with my Calulus | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Calculus** | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | What color Panties do you think i should wear? i might have you favorite color here somewhere... | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | I don't care | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Rainbow color, whatever | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | Your such a good boy, i'm gonna show you what good boys deserve.. you can tell me to do anything you want me too! | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | LO | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | LOL | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Really? | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Okay | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Now can you teach me Calculus already? | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | Ok let me know when you get in so I can invite you directly to my cam, you should get some minutes from my cam site so you can spend time with me sexy!!! | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | try again sweetie...Ok go to http://www.freecamlink.net/cntx and click on "JOIN FOR FREE" orange button at the top of the page to join up for FREE. | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | LOLL | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | k you in yet babe?? | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Nope | |||
JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | o x z ™ | try again sweetie...Ok go to http://www.freecamlink.net/cnan and click on "JOIN FOR FREE" orange button at the top of the page to join up for FREE. | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | I enjoy typing here looking at the response more than anything | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | Stop sending links | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | LOL | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | I'm L-ingMAO | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOL | |||
o x z ™ | JeaneRozancetgity @hotmail.com | No gonna help me with my Calculus? |
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
The English Language
Have you ever wondered why foreigners have trouble with the English Language?
Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.
Let's face it
English is a stupid language.
There is no egg in the eggplant
No ham in the hamburger
And neither pine nor apple in the pineapple.
English muffins were not invented in England
French fries were not invented in France.
We sometimes take English for granted
But if we examine its paradoxes we find that
Quicksand takes you down slowly
Boxing rings are square
And a guinea pig is neither from Guinea nor is it a pig.
If writers write, how come fingers don't fing.
If the plural of tooth is teeth
Shouldn't the plural of phone booth be phone beeth
If the teacher taught,
Why didn't the preacher praught.
If a vegetarian eats vegetables
What the heck does a humanitarian eat!?
Why do people recite at a play
Yet play at a recital?
Park on driveways and
Drive on parkways
You have to marvel at the unique lunacy
Of a language where a house can burn up as
It burns down
And in which you fill in a form
By filling it out
And a bell is only heard once it goes!
English was invented by people, not computers
And it reflects the creativity of the human race
(Which of course isn't a race at all)
That is why
When the stars are out they are visible
But when the lights are out they are invisible
And why it is that when I wind up my watch
It starts
But when I wind up this observation,
It ends.
Copied and pasted from http://www.ahajokes.com/eng002.html
Thursday, February 18, 2010
Another conversation..
Strange, I always like to post our conversation here.. Why?
| Date | Time | From | To | Message | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:32:41 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | ::NUDGE:: | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:32:54 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | ::NUDGE:: | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:33:12 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | wassup oxz? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:37:34 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | where are you now/ | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:37:36 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | ? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:10 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Home | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:11 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | JB | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:25 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | You? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:29 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | going cs tmr? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:33 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | home JB | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:36 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | No. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:38 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Not going.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:39 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | what a coincidence | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:43 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | i dont see you here? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:45 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | LOL | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:51 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | I don't know.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:39:57 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | I don't see you here either.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:02 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | thats weird | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:12 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | you are in home Jb too right? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:14 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Yeah.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:18 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Yeah. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:24 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | How come I don't see you? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:27 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | we may be in a different time | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:28 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | I go find you. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:29 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | damn | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:44 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Are you hiding under the sofa? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:48 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Ya.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:51 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | shouldnt have walk into that room and press the button | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:52 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | no | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:40:52 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | What time are you at now? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:00 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | 12.40 | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:04 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | What day? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:07 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Date? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:13 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Year? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:17 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | 16 Feb 2010 | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:23 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | B.C. or A.D. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:25 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | ? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:29 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | ad | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:35 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Oh.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:41:50 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | I'm at Feb 18 2010, A.D. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:42:46 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | oh | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:42:50 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | 2 days late | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:42:50 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | 12:42am | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:03 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | i'll see you in 2 days time | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:04 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | lol | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:06 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | oh wait | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:08 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Ya, maybe | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:11 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | No.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:16 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | I'm here and I don't see you | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:17 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | you'll be in feb 20 then | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:36 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | So you probably wouldn't see me after 2 days | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:43:53 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | You shouldn't be here by then.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:44:09 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Oh yeah | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:44:12 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | That possible too.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:05 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | yea | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:07 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | sucks | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:12 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Ya.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:12 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | when you going to nilai? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:18 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | That means we'll never meet.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:19 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Sad. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:26 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Maybe tomorrow. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:34 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | and maybe not.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:38 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Not sure.. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:45:41 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | okayy | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:46:47 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | LOL. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:46:54 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | I'm posting this in my blog. | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:47:02 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | Thought you wanted to see blog update? | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:47:11 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | yea | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:47:13 AM | joshua | o x z ™ | finally | ||||
| 2/18/2010 | 12:47:18 AM | o x z ™ | joshua | LOL |
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